Friday, August 25, 2006

Lie #6: My loneliness will disappear once I'm married.

My dear sisters! As mentioned several times before--only Christ can truly fill those spaces in our hearts. When we seek Him daily, He fills us with Himself and loneliness subsides. Married women sometimes feel lonely.

I'd like to expand on this...but I also want to get 7-10 done! I'd like to touch on this subject (#6) more once 7-10 are done, with the perspectives of married woman. Don't give up on me...hang in there!

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Lie #6: Coming Soon!

I've been unable to connect to the internet for about a week. We'll get 6-10 done quickly~ have patience! :)

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Lie 5. I cannot express my "maternal instincts" if I do not marry.

Simply stated: NOT TRUE!

Perhaps while you live the single life you will not actually become a mother, but the idea of expressing maternal instincts can be a reality in the life of a single woman. God created women to be caretakers. And, while this modern age negates what I am about to say, women have a built in, God given desire to "mother." How can one express that desire outside of marriage? Believe it or not, it is possible.

In some other posts I mentioned the joyous times I have had with nephews, my niece, and several of my "missionary" nephews and nieces. While I realize that being a mother carries much more responsibilities and efforts than being an aunt or a friend does, I believe that God has allowed me to express my "maternal instincts" by allowing me to care for and 'love on' the children of others.

Be creative and seek to involve yourself in the lives of families around you. Learn to truly involve yourself in the lives of the children of those families. I will list below some examples I have learned to incorporate into my own life. Remember, I am married but I still have no children of my own! So, I still seek to express those maternal instincts as well!

* Have an "all day camp" in your home. Instead of seeing it as "babysitting," try to view it as a way to get to know children and give their mom's a break for a day. Believe me, you will have to break out those maternal instincts!
* Have a slumber party. Again, this gives the mom's a break and you will be the one dealing with monsters in the closet for at least a night!
* Remember special days and moments in the lives of the children around you. Invite the one celebrating for a special dinner or activity with you.
* Spend time--a lot of time--with families. Believe me, when you have established a good relationship with a mom, she will appreciate the efforts you make to care for her children.
* Change diapers for your friend's babies. This will not only relive your friend for a few minutes, but it's a great training moment!

The possibilities are endless--really! Below you'll find links to two books I found extremely helpful. Both of these amazing sisters in Christ share information related to this topic. (And, to many of the other items touched so far!) While you visit the links, check out their main pages.

Did I Kiss Marriage Goodbye? by Carolyn McCulley

Singled Out For Him by Nancy Leigh DeMoss

Well, we're half way there! I'm hoping to get 6-10 done more quickly than 1-5! :) We'll see what happens!

Saturday, August 05, 2006

Lie #4. I will never find fulfillment as a single woman.

This will be a short post. Fulfillment is a word that runs rampant in the advertising business. We have sodas, chocolates, vacations, and an infinite range of new and exciting products that promise fulfillment. All of those things simply provide temporary fulfillment. Only Jesus Christ provides the eternal fulfillment that our souls long to experience.

Our culture sets so many defining marks for people to reach for. We graduate from high school, we go to college, we find our spouse in college, we get a job, we take some graduate study classes, we advance in our job, and on and on and on. Somehow, single christian women have been led to believe that if they do not marry (and in their 20's!) and care for their home, husband, and kids that they will never quiet find fulfillment in life. One author went so far as to say that no woman will ever be complete until she marries and has children. Do I believe that God designed man and woman to marry and procreate? Yes, I do. Do I believe that we live in a fallen world where people remain single or marry and never have children? Yes, I do. You see, only a growing, intimate relationshiop with Christ frees me from the sinful world into which I was born. Only my life with Him makes me whole.

Please don't dream away the hours feeling empty inside because you don't have a husband. Do you want to know a secret? Most married women have moments of unfulfillment and emptiness--mostly when they let their relationship with Christ slip into a dull moment. Husbands don't fulfill! Christ does!

What about being a mom? How can a single woman ever find true fulfillment if she never has the chance to become a mom? I will address that in the next post.

To end today on a "lift-me-up" note, remember that statistics show that most people will marry. Don't think that God has abandoned you or that you have lost your chance to marry. Remember Edith, a former missionary to Brazil who married for the first time in her 80's. She had to be one of the happiest and most beautiful blushing brides I have ever seen in my life.

Let Jesus fulfill your sould today!